#12: Global Crisis

It’s pretty hard to escape the “global financial crisis” that is going on. Every day I’m reading about the whether the markets are recovering about rescue packages and speculation over the future.

I don’t really understand the finer details, but recognise that the world is on tenterhooks.

There is a part of me that hopes the world will change and not simply aim to restore itself to the world we are used to. That each country can reclaim, relearn and redeem its ability and desire to sustain itself whilst recognising that the world is interconnected and that its sustainability is entwined with this process.

I guess it’s having a dual citizenship: one to the planet and one to your host country.

I don’t know how sound this is economically, financially or even conceivably, but it seems to make sense in my little brain to do so.

I continually hear about sustainability and one planet mentality being espoused. But it seems to be more aspirational rather than achievable.

I just see a window for the world for change in my lifetime.

#10: Ray Avenell

I want to tell of someone who has actually been somewhat an angel in disguise.

I first heard of Ray Avenell in 2004, when in a meeting with Blythswood Care. They said I should meet with him to discuss how to raise support for GH.

Over the years Ray has humbly offered his help to fund, gather support and be a buddy to GH. He’s given me gifts for the children. Gifts for our house and always been there giving.

He’s now out here with us in Hong Kong on a fact finding mission to see how he can help more.

It was his words that prompted the Kent Police to give us a property to use (another entry on this is coming).

I am in awe of such a kind hearted, giving person. Blythswood really have a reputation of spawning humble and powerful advocates.

Not only that, but Caleb adores him :)

#9: Respite

Respite comes in various forms. Ours was time to stroll down to the beach, to be child free, to enjoy a beer and talk through the many lows and few highs of the day.

By the end of the few hours we got. We were smiling and recharged.

#8: the wedding

today we won the worst parents in the world award.

I am glad that today is over. I am glad that as I type this the kids are asleep and everyone is partying. I am glad too that we can cower away in the refuge of this lovely apartment.

Today was the wedding day. A day centered around Steve & KT. Man did they and all the party look great and it was a beautiful day filled with celebration and joy.

We, however, got to see and take part in very little of it. You know those times when you’re out and you see howling children and parents losing it with their kids. The families that are always telling their children off. The families that you try to make conscious, or subconscious efforts, to avoid. Well that was us.

We could feel every stare and heard every word of sympathy as a painful stab into our souls as we hung our, inward, heads in shame.

I can’t really put my finger on what it was that happened. Yes it could be the little sleep they had after a really exciting day yesterday. Yes it could be the extreme waiting (1 hour for the bride to turn up) that weddings hold. Yes it could be that some stood on Caleb. Or even yes it could be the fact that we were at the mercy of transportation held for us and the lack of a quick getaway. But I rather think it was our inability to cope with the situation.

Ground open up and swallow us now.

#7: A Garage Story

Sometimes there are points when you simply have to smile and say “Thank You!”

Today was one of those times.

Not only did we get to go to Hong Kong Disneyland, we also managed to have a prayer answered.

A man & a little boy, who we don’t even know the names of have just delivered a garage with a set of cars at our apartment.

We don’t know them let alone know that they had this beautiful toy set.

But they dropped it off with the simple words “we thought your boys would like to play with this. Enjoy.”

As they left Angie was there with a glisten in her eyes and a huge smile. She later disclosed that the other day she had said a quiet prayer that the boys could have something to play with. In particular she had requested specifically whether this could be a garage and some cars.

Thank you. :)

#4: HK Humidity

Dang, it’s hot here.

If I were saying this back in Tunbridge Wells I would be telling myself to count my blessings as I would be yearning to escape the rain, cold and wet.

Yet here I am avoiding the sun.

#3: Jet Lag

What time is it?

Must have asked myself this a hundred times in the few hours that I’ve been here.

I don’t know if it’s the mental arithmetic that you have to do in your head, the constant working out of which way to add or subtract the hour difference, or even just the curiosity to know what you would be doing at an equivalent time back home. But from a man whose life seems to be governed by the big and little hands of our forth dimensional friend I find myself grappling with this question.

But seriously, what time is it?

#2: A blissful moment

So here I am on the beach with my wonderful family enjoying the view, the sand, the sun, the sea and the beach.

You can eve see the planes coming into land… it looks and feels all good.

(i'll be attaching a photo once i get my shots onto the camera- watch this space)

#1: Up, up in the sky

After getting to the airport, finding the parking lot, transfer to airport whilst admiring the overpassing planes, eventually getting to the counter it transpired that joshie didn’t have a ticket. A small oversight. I’m so pleased that we agonised over the decision where to place joshie and whether to get a seat or not or how to transport him, the wait the ten minute wait (twice) to speak to an operator in the airline to enquire about traveling with kids to check how to fit him in a bassinet and the actual booking of one after carefully calculating his weight eventuated in a chap saying to me: “oh, he’s not got a ticket”

We got our boarding tickets eventually and an unexpected, but welcomingly, we met another wedding guest, Stevie, a groomsman, en route to honkers.

Caleb & Joshie had been loving the airport. It was all new and constant wonders for them to gaze at- buggies, luggage trolleys, conveyor belts, escalators, neon and people.

Once into the departure lounge we met on-duty Jonny. Had a quick cuppa. Caleb kindly spilt his smoothie over Jonny’s jacket. He fought the law…

On the plane, we were let on first due to the kids and then the awe came back. But as did the urge to run around. By this time they were both shattered. I thought this is it. My nightmare is about to come true: two over tired kids, an eleven hour full flight and the eyes of an entire plane pressing upon you. The prospects were not good.

Joshie didn’t like being strapped in at all. Arching his back. Crying. But it didn’t last.

Caleb, once we were airbourne was fidgeting and felt like a caged animal. But it didn’t last.

After the meal Joshie fell asleep. For Caleb it took a little longer. Principally cause he couldn’t get comfy. I don’t blame him.

The one thing that struck me was: this plane is actually really noisy. It was the engines. When the kids did cry. Yeah you could hear them, but only just and those who were not plugged into their entertainment systems probably didn’t hear a thing.

Caleb got 6 hours and Joshie 5.5 hours kip and the coming down was without incident. The only drama was the coordinating their meals and our meals- which was simple: they eat and then when they’re done we get our bite after.

We arrive in Hong Kong and after all that worry we both sigh with relief and are utterly thankful that we are here and through phase 2.

Oh and Joshie turned 1 today… gosh, this time last year we were… wow :)

nervous

today's the day we fly.

i've done this before. angie has done this before. caleb has even done this before.

but we've never done this before: 12 hours on a plane crossing 8 hours of time zones, attempt the already difficult task of sleeping in the flying bird with little ones, taking joshie on a plane, fly as a family, all this and more.

nervous? ... very.

there's is comfort from the fact that we're not the first to do this. there is comfort from the tips that we have read. there is even comfort from the prayers promised to us.

whilst i am really excited about hong kong, the fun, the wedding and work... did i mention that i'm nervous?

marriage course: forgiveness

angie & i have recently been doing the marriage course.

it came about after we were invited to go on it and one of our good friends, just recently completed their course jumped in and said how amazing it was and even offered to baby sit.

we, after some time, said why not. it would be great to spend some evenings looking at marriage, our marriage and talking to one another. it certainly would be good to get some time out.

usually get a little skeptic about these "help" type groups and went in thinking yeah this will just be a dos as we've got it sorted.

we're in week 4 and already we're discovering some hard truths about issues that we've left latent.

last night we were hearing about the power of forgiveness in your relationship. how it is not a feeling, about justice or even a right. rather it is a choice and act of will. also we were reminded that it is costly act and one that isn't a simply just a cure or instant remedy.

what i did hear was that whilst it is not a cure, it is a place for where rebuilding and recovery can start and a place where letting go of hurt can happen.

the lady, Sue B, who leads on this course shared this phenomenal reading of a holocaust victim meeting with one of her former tormentors in a church and is faced with a choice of forgiveness or holding onto her hatred that has defined her for so long:

It was in a church in Munich where I was speaking in 1947 that I saw him--a balding heavyset man in a gray overcoat, a brown felt hat clutched between his hands. One moment I saw the overcoat and the brown hat, the next, a blue uniform and a visored cap with its skull and crossbones.

Memories of the concentration camp came back with a rush: the huge room with its harsh overhead lights, the pathetic pile of dresses and shoes in the center of the floor, the shame of walking naked past this man. I could see my sister's frail form ahead of me, ribs sharp beneath the parchment of skin.

Betsie and I had been arrested for concealing Jews in our home during the Nazi occupation of Holland. This man had been a guard at Ravensbruck concentration camp where we were sent.

Now he was in front of me, hand thrust out: "A fine message, fraulein! How good it is to know that, as you say, all our sins are at the bottom of the sea!"

It was the first time since my release that I had been face to face with one of my captors and my blood seemed to freeze.

"You mentioned Ravensbruck in your talk," he was saying. "I was a guard there. But since that time," he went on, "I have become a Christian. I know that God has forgiven me for the cruel things I did there, but I would like to hear it from your lips as well. Fraulein--" again the hand came out--"will you forgive me?"

And I stood there--and could not. Betsie had died in that place--could he erase her slow terrible death simply for the asking?

It could not have been many seconds that he stood there, hand held out, but to me it seemed hours as I wrestled with the most difficult thing I had ever had to do.

For I had to do it--I knew that. The message that God forgives has a prior condition: that we forgive those who have injured us. "If you do not forgive men their trespasses," Jesus says, "neither will your Father in Heaven forgive your trespasses."

Still I stood there with the coldness clutching my heart. But forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart. "Jesus, help me!" I prayed silently. "I can lift my hand. I can do that much. You supply the feeling."

And so woodenly, mechanically, I thrust my hand into the one stretched out to me. And as I did, an incredible thing took place. The current started in my shoulder, raced down my arm, sprang into our joined hands. And then this healing warmth seemed to flood my whole being, bringing tears to my eyes.

"I forgive you, brother!" I cried. "With all my heart!"

For a long moment we grasped each other's hands, the former guard and former prisoner. I had never known God's love so intensely as I did then.

illness

tis the season for illness.

caleb & joshie have been fairly ill this past week. :(

it sucks when they're ill. caleb, usually, mr hyper, is snuggling up under a blanket watching tv snuggled in on angie's lap.

it made me recall back to my days of being ill. mum would leave me snuggled up on the sofa and allow me to watch tv. occasionally i'd get up and make a colonial viper or x-wing out of the lego that she had brought down for me to play with. it was sad that often she had to leave me to work.

mummy and papa used to always pamper me. i recall when i left home to go to kenya or college my one fear was falling ill and not having my mum near by to look after me.

i look down and see caleb snuggled on angie's lap. both he, and joshie, are looking to their mummy, as i did, for their comfort in those weak times.

caffeine & energy drinks

so i've been finding myself grabbing more energy drinks over the past few months than i ever have. i even once or twice resorted to caffeine tablets.

it's not so much that i like the taste. rather the boost it could give me.

energy drinks are legal in this country as is coffee.

from my understanding of addiction, the treatment is centered on the addict rather than the substance.

i get the link between the two. sometimes it's easier to go on what you are used to than to stop

i guess i'm just tired.

a mad rush

if ever you have a passports that need renewing, do it a year before their deadline. do not wait till the last two weeks. and do not do 3 at the same time with the same deadline. if, however, you do wish to cut it fine then this is our learning for you.

first thing to do is the decision making process. in our case, i was telling angie about how i'm going to be away most of october: first in hong kong, for work and a colleague's wedding, and then later to lebanon. i had a week inbetween each. whilst giving some of the more intracate details such as where and when and the ramifications of me being away angie proposed "what if we were to come with you?". jumping on the chance i followed up with a routine "you serious?"... and then a well we better sort it out quick as i'm not sure there'll be a place for us to stay re the wedding. so we made a deal: if there was a room for us then we go. no room, no trip.

i sent a quick text to a colleague. she texted back immediately to say there was one room left (the wedding is in 3 weeks) and she's given it to us. we're going to hong kong.

the second thing to do, the bit i perhaps like less: the organising. as i'm learning when travelling with a family the whole situation is more complex: working out optimum times that the kids would sleep, their sleeping arrangements, the cost-benefit of direct/indirect flights.

i might add one big feature is the finance too. we really don't have the kind of money that this warrants to spare. but we've made the decision. but this really is another matter and i may tell it at a later stage...

we all quickly realised that the only person with a valid passport was caleb. so we had to obtain 3 passports within 2.5 weeks. the challenge is set.

after a day of form filling chasing around to get countersignatures, photographs, getting joshie to sit still through his photo shoot we managed to book an appointment to get these done with a week fast track service. [note: i did not know that you're not allowed to smile for your passport photographs until i went to the shop to get mine done]

so as i left this morning (too early) to london i realised on the train that i had left one of my ID forms behind and also we were already carrying a form with a countersignature outside the explicit no go areas on the form (the blurb states that this invalidates the form in big bold letters). so as i walk to get my tube. the announcement stated that all tubes had been canceled. dang, i had 15 mins to get across london, on foot, what would take 15 mins on tube. the likelihood that i was going to make it on time for my "set in stone" appointment. gosh.

i do what any man would. walk in the right direction. trying to catch a bus and perhaps flag a bus down. praying that i would make it i look in my wallet and i have 10 quid... is that enough for a cab?... well let's see...

after trying to cross 8 roads and heavy london traffic i manage to get a cab. the cabbie said that it would be touch n go whether i'd make the appointment but he'd try his best.

he did just that. in fact he managed to add his conspiracy theories about the "added security" across the government buildings pro bono. he made his point that we have all this security and it's really just a show. if we're going to have terrorists they'll find away. hmmm... thanks.

i got into the passport office slightly late. i was told to be there 15 minutes early to allow time for security checks. it was like an airport. x ray machines, boxes for your change and phones, security guards. they say allow 15 mins to get through security. it took me 3. phew... i am by somewhat a miracle 3 minutes early. now all we need to get through is the official and the red tape.

i wait. close my eyes and say thanks for being here in time. as i open my eyes my number gets called. i walk over to the counter.

the gentleman first spotted that my countersignature person had not included their passport details on the form. the form is invalid.

he suggested that i could make a call. worth a shot. so i phoned jonny whilst on duty at heathrow airport (he stops bad guys... can't say more as if i did...) he said he had written it on the back of a card that angie stuck in one of the envelopes. like a magician with a hat i stretched my hand inside the envelope and pulled out a card. i didn't notice it before. looked at all the scribbles of names and telephone notes and then i saw a number. it was jonny's handwriting. bingo. i write the number on all 3 forms.

now for the tricky bit. i confessed. i mentioned that one of the signatures had gone outside of the explicitly "do NOT go outside of the box" part of the form. he calmly shrugs it aside and said that it's fine. what? all that tension and nervousness about how we live in an age of terrorism and this is the governments clampdown on the citizens rooting out the bad eggs to be calmed in one second. hang on maybe that cabbie was right.

so with all that adventure and what seemed to battling the government, transport system and bureaucracy we got our 3 passports.

we're off to hong kong... now about the money... :)

no time like the present

i am finding myself desperately short of time. i have a to do list that's longer than the hours of the day and with deadlines that are all yesterday.

i keep listening to hear many people say similar things. "if only i had more time...", "there are not enough hours in the day", "we need to be guarding our time"...

personally, i'm feeling a little hard done here by the constant time factor in my life... it's not that i want more of it, but rather i feel that there's something not quite right about my, or our, perception of it. i can't put my finger on it.

a late night account

so i've been up the last few nights trying to get my head around accounts. not so much the figures stuff, but just the phenomenal terminology.

wittgenstein used to refer to language games and this is clearly the language game of accountants.

thankfully, i'm surrounded by a few people that are wiser than me that have been able to advise accordingly.

but honestly... does anyone else have problems getting past the basics... i mean real basics, like how to spell "accounts"...

konichiwa

so we met up with one of angie's old friends from her college days rie. she was over from japan with her family.

it was a fun trip up to london and some nice time of catching up and family bonding. whilst our language skills were ok... it was simply amazing to just hang out and we had such a delightful afternoon eating pizza, chasing squirrels and ducks, running around and eating yummy japanese sweets.

... oh and caleb and saki had a great time :)

smallville: the early years

little to offer

believe it or not i'm a kind of person that is quite negative about myself. i don't think i have much to offer, nor do i view myself as particularly talented.

i often have "shower moments" when i think, sometime to angie's amusement out loud, "what on earth am i doing... surely we need some professional whatsit to do this."

still being in the business of volunteering i often look around and see such latent talent. many people have said they don't know what they could do. i usually bite my lip, but think man surely it's a case of what can't you do. the sky's the limit... the world's your oyster.

i was brought up with my mother always telling me that i could do anything. yeah, mum i'm still waiting for NASA to call me up for their next trip. but i do still hold to her words and believe at somepoint i will write my book, that i will become a musician and that in the future..... hmmmm. i guess what it comes down to: my mother gave me was hope. hope that i could be that proverbial person that is not looking at the gutter, but towards the stars.

recently, i have been working with a couple of volunteers that have kindly given up their summer and i have seen them try out some pretty cool stuff. one in particular impressed me with his "can do" attitude. a willingness to throw himself into what many would deem as "scary" situations.

what amazed me was not so much his skill set, but just the sheer humility of the purpose and the will to step out of his comfort zones. he reminded me of this hope that my mum used to speak of.

... i'm pretty sure NASA are going to call tomorrow.

back to basics

having just come back from a holiday in a basic farm house in wales i am feeling somewhat "natural" or "manly".

it was a holiday where all we did was chop wood, make fires, eat & drink and hang out at beaches. no fancy museums or novelty theme parks, no zoos or other artificial entertainment venues and certainly limited mod cons.


not that i did much wood cutting nor hunting for animals albeit i did watch pete cast his fishing rod, but i went with a bunch of people and certain roles started to emerge. the fire gatherers, the cooks, the child keepers, the fire starters and the entertainers. i had heaps of fun.

caleb & joshie got to hang out with other kids and play. they loved the beach: trying to build holes, sandcastles, crab catching, climbing rocks, jumping in the sea, eating sand and swimming.

i gotta confess in the build up to the holiday i was somewhat nervous at the simplicity of the place and found myself thinking if only there was central heating or decent beds. however, in the aftermath i found that whilst the place was not a luxurious pad it was a magical place that allowed me, as a city clicker, a semi chance of getting back to basics.

already looking forward to next year :)

(here's a vid of angie & jo's b'day party that we threw for them :)