white lies

i've never been a good liar and recently i told a fib.

it was to get me out of an embarrassing situation. something i did got sent to the wrong person. blah , blah and i like most others when confronted this the question: did you actually do it, didn't pass up an opportunity to flatly deny my guilt.

game over? well not quite.

the more i described my alibi i found my imagination running amok as well as my huge drive to prove my innocence in this ghastly act of "injustice". i was the victim here and was "weaving a web of falsehoods" and the more i did so the more i realised that i'm being a complete fool and slowly having to bring in third parties and incriminate them for things that they didn't do. all because i didn't want to look like an idiot. however, with my convoluted story i'd got to the point where i'm not sure anyone would believe me... how on earth would anyone buy into such complexities. i had somehow managed to blame companies and people who i couldn't prove were round me at the incriminating time. my stories were starting to conflict. my name is mud.

after an hour or two of feeling fairly uncomfortable and squirming. i confessed to my faults and said sorry. the weight of the guilt was lifted.

but a new feeling of stupidity was there instead. i've never been a good liar.